"The most precious thing we leave behind when we die is not our property; it is our legacy of values and beliefs. Yet, when we think of a will, we usually think of a legal document intended to divide up one's property and provide financial security for one's heirs.

But there is another kind of will that has long been in use in Jewish history and its aim is to bequeath a spiritual legacy, a heritage of values. Those who write ethical wills - often parents writing to their children or grandparents to their grandchildren - try to sum up what they have learned in life, and to express what they want most for, and from, their loved ones.

Precious spiritual documents, ethical wills are windows into the souls of those who write them. They are left behind in the belief that the wisdom acquired in a lifetime is as much a part of a family's legacy as are all of its material possessions." (Reprinted by permission of Jewish Lights Publishing, 800-962-4544.)

Spiritual Wills today are relevant for people of all faiths and all backgrounds. They are personalized documents intended to give a unique and intimate view of beliefs and values reflecting one's very being and are, in fact, a legacy of love.

Most people think about having a Will drafted as being an odious but necessary task and expense--one frought with concern for the material well-being of those they love and wish to protect. Spiritual Wills are very different. They are an adventure into one's self. Most Wills are merely instruments that pass on the the things accumulated during life. A Spiritual Will does more. It is personalized to incorporate philosophical and/or spiritual inserts of favorite passages of the one for whom the Will is written, chosen by him or her. It is a testimonial of sorts for their own unique Life.

In essence, a Spiritual Will passes on the wisdom and experience of one's life. It is also a written legacy of spiritual and philosophical ideals to comfort and sustain those left behind who grieve and mourn. In fact, a Spiritual Will can uplift the hearts and souls of beloved family and friends to comfort the bereaved, especially if read at the funeral/memorial service as a last parting farewell (or excerpts read from Spiritual Legal Will).

A Spiritual Will can be incorporated into the legal Will for those with small simple straight-forward estates needing no tax planning. However, it is not recommended to be used alone as a substitute for a good Will or Living Trust. In fact, for those who have legal issues needing tax planning, it is best to do a Spiritual Will separate from the necessarily complex legal document.

Writing a Spiritual Will is also to contemplate and bring to one's awareness feelings about the inevitable transition from Life to death that all mankind must go through and can be as meaningful in its creation as it is with its aftereffects. Any individual can write his/her own Spiritual Will. One does not need to be an attorney to write a Spritual Will. However, putting one's life succinctly into the written word is more readily accomplished with the help of an impartial expert/interviewer or one who is skilled at writing. CAVEAT: To incorporate a Spiritual Will into a simple legal Will should only be done with the help of an attorney.

Thus, Spiritual Wills can be written by the layman (if you ever get around to it). Or, creating a Spiritual Will can be an interactive journey into creation, not for the faint-hearted or weak of spirit. It does and will make you reach deeper into your own Soul and connect more consciously with your inner Higher Self. If done thoughtfully and with foresight, the process can help to make you feel at peace with the universe and with the inevitability of dying.

The popular columnist, Celestine Sibley, from the Atlanta Journal Constitution, wrote in a March 29, 1991 article:
 

"It must be that Holy Week reminds even us sinners of our own mortality. Three people have called me lately to ask advice about making their Wills, one of them an old gentleman who promised me that if I didn't hurry with my counsel, he'd die intestate by this Good Friday."
Panicked by the prospect, I urged him to call a lawyer immediately.
He sighed heavily. 'I don't want legalese,' he complained. 'I want somebody to put my leavings in pretty language.' Did he want a will that would stand up in court and give his heirs as little trouble as possible? Or did he want something poetic for reading at a family tea party? He considered and decided to skip the whole thing.
'Let the vultures fight,' he said. 'I haven't got all that much anyhow.'"

 

Wills are generally cold and factual documents written by lawyers and little understood by most laymen. The real "Soul" of a person is rarely expressed within its pages. Usually it is an unfeeling legalistic and boring account of the disposition to loved ones and/or charity of the "material" accumulation of a lifetime. Is there any doubt then why it becomes a burdensome task?

Spiritual Wills generate personal growth. A basic premise of how a Will could be drafted with an eye to giving it "heart" is based on the quote: "Tell me, I'll Forget; Show me, I may Remember; Involve me, and I'll Understand." By "involving" clients in the process, they can take an active part in its creation. The document then truly becomes one of the client's own making--and a personal farewell.

The possibilities of implementing a Spiritual Will are endless. With the help and guidance of my Higher Power, whom I call God, I drafted my own Will in this creative format. Following are excerpts which illustrate how it can flow:

I, Diane Dalton, being of sound and disposing mind and memory, mindful of the uncertainties of life and the certainty of death, and in anticipation of death, whenever that shall be, hereby revoking and annulling all other Wills and Codicils heretofore made by me, do hereby make, publish and declare this my Last Will and Testament.

First, my beloved Family and Friends, I desire to share with you a favorite work found in The Book of Runes by Ralph Blum, which I hope shall comfort you in this your time of sorrow which is hopefully my time of joy and enlightenment:

Since these are the last words you shall hear from me in life, I desire not to bore you, but to uplift you and turn the 'Sweet Sorrow' of parting into loving remembrance of each other. May this Will also be a poignant reminder through my death that you have to leave the body--even if you have no knowledge of when that might be. Don't put off forgiving. Don't put off loving. Do everything with so much love in your heart, that you wouldn't want to do it any other way..."

Later in the Will, after the usual appointing of an Executor and other legal requirements, another quote from the Timberlake Monthly Magazine is incorporated into the main body to inspire a pioneering attitude that I often felt when reading it:

Now, my dearly beloved Family and Friends, I again wish to impart and pass on to you a favorite piece of philosophy I picked up along life's way that often helped me when there was not a clear and certain course of action or direction to take in life:
 

'When Dr. David Livingston was working in Africa, a group of friends wrote him: 'We would like to send other men to you. Have you found a good road in your area yet?' According to a member of his family, Dr. Livingston sent this message in reply: 'If you have men who will only come if there is a good road, I don't want them. I want men who will come if there is no road at all.'

Today as I draft this Will to share my thoughts to pass them on to you along with the 'material' accumulation of my Life, I hope you will have an opportunity to browse through my personal belongings to enable you to choose something of special significance to you that you would delight in having....I further direct my Executor to divide and distribute any and all such personal belongings in my estate that may have some sentimental value to my family and friends as she feels just and proper. So that there shall be no disagreements or arguments, my Executor is authorized to direct any persons wanting the same item(s) to allow the use of Chance or Pure Luck (or as I choose to believe, God's guidance) by flipping a coin or drawing straws. In all seriousness, anything to avoid conflict at the time of my death shall be the means employed. In fact, I would not mind a little laughter among your tears by those I have loved."

"Finally, in saying 'Good-bye' one last time to you my beloved Family and Friends, I wish to share with you a poen by Colleen Cozah Hitchcock which expresses my heart to each of you I hold dear. (You may purchase framed prints or prints of this poem from her website.)

To illustrate the variances a Spiritual Will can contain to reflect the individuality of the one for whom it is written, following are excerpts from a friend/client's Will who requested a Spiritual Will after reading mine. After the initial interview, she was instructed to select 3 passages to incorporate into her Will that had special meaning and significance for her life - one for the introductory portion of the Will, one for the main body and one for the closing. (Some time was allotted for her to contemplate and accomplish this task.) In the meantime, I wrote an initial draft of her desires regarding the disposition of her property, real and personal, naming the Executor, etc.

Then we met again and she shared with me why and how she had come to select those particular passages out of the many she could have selected (being in her 50's, a teacher and an avid reader, she had a wealth of material from which to choose). From this session, I was able to create the words to introduce her passages and facilitate the document's flow by incorporating her individual philosophical/spiritual inclinations with the necessary passing on of material wealth. A draft of the entire Will was sent to her for her review.

By telephone, we next discussed any changes in the material disposition and how I had incorporated the passages to develop the final product. We further discussed the order and placement of the passages into her Will and the incorporating language. The ideas were exactly what she wanted to convey although in reading it together, she asked if some wording could be different and some deleted. Listening to her comments, I readily agreed to her changes while making suggestions and comments as we talked to make modifications. After only a few minutes, she felt that my acceptance of her input had captured the unique heart and Soul of her.

By involving her in active participation of the creative process, she was able to feel a true sense of ownership of the completed document. At the end of that call, a mutually convenient time was set for having the Will executed by her and properly witnessed. Following are the passages she chose along with the incorporation language:

INTRODUCTORY INSERT: To celebrate my passing from this Life, it is my further desire and intentional direction that my Executor conduct a "Transition Celebration" after my death and that my beloved friends and relatives be invited and joyful music be provided along with food (vegetarian) and drink (non-alcoholic), the cost thereof to be paid out of my estate. Such planned "Transition Celebration" shall be in addition to or in place of any memorial service my family shall wish to hold and hopefully be a time of joyful sharing and caring of each other for those who knew me well. At this "Transition Celebration", it is my desire that the philosophical and/or spiritual paragraphs and passages I have included in this Will be read aloud and shared with all those who attend. The following passage, dear ones, was received at a special Centrophic Integration Workshop conducted by Camden Clay, D.C. during the early development of his special healing teachings:

 

'Until one is committed  there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back,  always ineffectiveness.  Concerning all acts of initiative  there is one elementary truth,  the ignorance of which kills countless ideas  and splendid plans:  that the moment one definitely commits oneself,  then Providence moves too.  All sorts of things occur to help one  that would never otherwise have occurred.  A whole stream of events issue from the decision,  raising in one's favor all manner  of unforeseen incidents and meetings  and material assistance  which no man could have dreamt  would have come his way.  Whatever you can do or dream you can do--begin it.  Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.'

--The Scottish Himalayan Expedition  by W. H. Murray

It is my hope that this powerful favorite passage of mine will impart in each of you an energized moment as it has for me many times. So, dream, commit and begin, beloved family and friends."

My friend/client's second selection reflects more of her personal outlook on life, as follows:

MAIN BODY INSERT: A little book I treasured in Life, Everything Happens for the Best: A book of contemplations, a Siddha Yoga publication, contains within it the following writing by my Teacher, Baba Muktananda:

 

'Everything happens according to the will of God.  Have full faith in this.  Then every place, every moment, every event of your life  begins to feel like heaven  and you are convinced that what is happening  is meant for you.'
--Swami Muktananda

 

I wished to share with each of you this writing that has instilled in me Trust in a Higher Power during the good times or bad and kept me hopeful that all things work out for the best." CLOSING INSERT: Lastly, in closing, dear ones, I want to share with you a time in my life where the following Biblical passage calmed me and kept me sane once in 1995 when I was driving alone in my car. Unexpectedly overwhelmed by panic, thoughts and emotions about fearing death and fearing fear itself, I was surprised and amazed that the words to the 23rd Psalm came to me spontaneously. Flowing freely, without need of my mind searching for words, I was calmed and reassured by repeating them over and over aloud to myself:

 

'The Lord is my Shepherd

The Lord is my Shepherd  I shall not want.  He maketh me to lie down in green pastures;  He leadeth me beside the still waters;  He restoreth my Soul.  He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness  for his name's sake.  Yea, though I walk through the valley of  the shadow of death,  I will fear no evil  For Thou art with me.  Thy rod and Thy staff,  they comfort me.  Thou preparest a table before me  in the presence of mine enemies;  Thou annointest my head with oil;  My cup runneth over.  Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me  All the days of my life.  And I will dwell in the house of the Lord  forever."

To my friend/client, these selections imparted for her the core of her beliefs and shared a part of herself that many friends and some of her family had not shared during her lifetime.

As Monica, the angel played by Roma Downey, in the recently popular weekly TV series "Touched by an Angel" said to the football coach who was her charge in that episode: "Some of our best living is done with the people we leave behind." (Saturday, August 12, 1995 episode at 9 PM entitled "Coach"--CBS, chn. 46). In other words, we have more of a far-reaching effect on those we leave behind with what we instill in life and pass on. In a very real sense, this co-creative method of sharing life's lessons and experiences can be a first step in the emotional "letting go" to prepare or ready oneself for the transition of death. Instead of a dreaded task, it can be a beautiful gift. Willing, according to the dictionary, is "being ready, being prepared." And dying--for many people--is something that happens to the other person...or at least, many are not really willing (ready/prepared) to die. Death, though, is generally accepted to be inevitable....someday. Time or energy given to the issues of dying are not often consciously included in our thought processes and made an integral and comfortable part of life. Serious illness or a loved one's death momentarily shocks one into facing it. But for the most part, dying is seriously ignored/denied by most people and put off until tomorrow. Contemplation of the issues sometimes comes with old age, but sufficient time and foresight are not always there to truly "get one's affairs in order." Although most everyone feels they will live a long time, an unexpected accident could end life in an instant - like a lightbulb that instantaneously burns out. It therefore would seem to be prudent to "Plan your life as if you'll live forever while you live each day as if it were your last."

Georgia is a state that is known for easy and inexpensive probate where there is a Will. However, when there is not a Will, the people left behind are left with more than grief, a BIG headache of figuring out what to do with the estate; in fact, what IS the estate, how to get into the safe deposit box, how to liquidate property, etc. A Will makes it so much easier for the burden to be borne, whether it be by parents, spouse, children or a trusted friend. Also, without a Will, an Administrator must be appointed which is costly and a more time-consuming procedure. Again, in today's society it is highly prudent and necessary to have a Will. Simple "Spiritual Legal Wills" can be drafted for those with small estates. However, for more complex estates or ones needing estate planning for tax advantages, an attorney is needed. And it is best not to complicate the complex legal Will or Trust any more by adding Spiritual inserts. Instead, a non-legal Spiritual Will can be made an Addendum to an already-existing Will or to a more complex Will or Trust, whichever instrument is most conducive to the individual's legal requirements. Moreover, many states do not have simple probate procedures like Georgia and a Trust document would be more practical. In those cases, a Spiritual Will is recommended to be a separate writing. To capture the development of the inner essence of the client, a Spiritual Will (standing alone) can be written by anyone good with words and is a legacy of Spirit rather than of matter or material wealth. Thus, it becomes an emerging frontier. So, are you ready and are you willing?!!! My wish for you, dear reader, is May you Live Forever....And Yet Be Willing!
 

The author, Diane Dalton, Esq., served as a facilitator for the State Bar of Georgia's 1994, 1995, 1996, 1997 and 1998 programs on Professionalism; from January 1990 to the present, she has been serving as an Arbitrator for Fulton County State and Superior Courts; in 1995, she became a volunteer Arbitrator for the Better Business Bureau of Atlanta, Georgia conducting primarily Autoline Lemon law cases; from 1989 through 1995, she served as a volunteer Mediator for the Justice Center of Atlanta, Inc.; she also served two years as a volunteer instructor for Literacy Action.

Ms. Dalton is in private practice as a solo practitioner in Atlanta, Georgia specializing in Spiritual Wills, Personal Injury and Wills/Probate. She desires to assist people in creating innovative spiritually and philosophically oriented Wills but cautions all to consider carefully their need for a legal will as well. In fact, she would be delighted to share her methods with attorneys or non-attorneys by teaching others this artform and has written this article for such a beginning. She believes that the concept of developing Spiritual Wills on a global scale is an unchartered path with no defined road and thus brings us into an emerging frontier.

 

If you are interested in 
creating a Spiritual Will, 
contact me.